This week I wanted to envoke feelings of decisiveness.
This feeling makes me feel powerful like I know what's going on and like I have 'ish under control.
Isn't that the dream! HA!
While I was planning the wedding this seemed to come so much easier.
I had a vision of everything and since it was "our big day" most people complied.
But now, being back in the thick of things sometimes I can have a hard time saying what I want or need out loud.
I noticed there was this fear that kept coming up whenever I would tell someone what I wanted or stood up for something I believed in I would automatically feel guilty
What if they don't agree? What if they don't want to do the thing?
With emotional investigation, I started to look at these questions and feelings more closely.
Where in my body do these feelings come up?
When have I felt like this before?
How have I shown up in the past?
How do I want to show up now?
Looking at my own answers I found that I was tying my worth and validation to others.
I was putting all of my eggs into another person's basket. What they wanted was more important than what I needed.
People pleasers start as parent pleasers
And so that is where the start of my healing process around this survival habit began.
And so this week I'm making the decisive choice to be on my own side.
To say what I want out loud
To know that I am enough on my own.
This week when someone asks you
"What do you wanna do?"
don't respond with
"I don't care"
this teaches your brain
"I don't matter"
Your opinion matters and the fact that you are being asked is a great place to start making decisive decisions!
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